Author's Comments # 4

1. First impressions are very important because rightly or wrongly that is often how we are judged. That is why good grammar is so important when we speak or write. That is also why it is important how we treat other people.

Remember Jack's first impression of Elizabeth, and even our first impression; it was OK until she showed her claws. In real life, we also need to give a person a chance to show their true personality and not judge them in the first few minutes. Having said all that, and having seen Elizabeth and Jenny in several situations, I'm with you. "Jack you fool, why are you even looking at Elizabeth, when Jenny is out there someplace".

2. Most of you picked out the multitude of things that took Jack from happiness and threw him into a pit of misery: the filth, the hunger, the cold, no job, no money. These are all things that can take a terrible toll on your mood. Even today, these factors are prominent in many suicides. You are all correct about these things.

A few of you (forgive me if I miss anybody) mentioned one additional thing that is critical in driving someone to truly consider suicide. Trent, you said it most succinctly when you said that Jack was "isolated". Tarajanr, Danielle, Justin, Kayleigh, Kyle B, and Sam, you all mentioned alone or loneliness. Most people can stand terrible hardship if they are part of a group, a team, a family; but when they are isolated they often fall apart very quickly. Jack endured some very tough times but the isolation was his ultimate undoing.

Now a couple of additional comments from me:

Chelsey, you keep referring to Jack as Jake. It's very important in this story that you have Jack's name spelled correctly. The whole story at one point is going to hinge on Jack's name. I'm not going to tell you any more details, but you'll recognize it when it comes. GRIN.

Kyle B, I loved your metaphor, "the awkwardness could be shredded with a cheese grater".

Many times we have heard that "the tension could be cut with a knife". You have found a novel way of describing the same situation without using the same old tired expression. The word "shredded" is a strong verb as well, very important in creative writing.

Stephen, yes the lighthouse (and other lights) is very important and will be in a lot of the action. It's not called Two Island "LIGHT" for nothing.

Clytie, I'm glad to see that you are here for the early parts of the story this time. I remembered.SMILE.

Tiffany H, I'm sorry that you find the story confusing. Continue trying to keep the characters straight, and at each scene try to remember what happened last with those characters. A complex story is often more satisfying in the end when all of the little stories come together.

Remember that when you see the asterisks, * * * in a book, that indicates that time has passed, and maybe the scene or characters have changed. I know that you don't see the words, but maybe your teachers will indicate a scene change whenever they happen.

So Jack has hit rock bottom, and now everything will be great. Right? Maybe not. Sometimes when you think everything is at it's worst, an author can find even nastier things to throw at his hero and heroine. Keep watching.